The Wandering Inn 3 End

So that is going to do it for me. Damn I managed to get through a lot of chapters. It just got so good then.

World Building in the best of ways! Thinking that the main character is a dumbass!!

I love Relc and Klbkch. They are hilarious partners, really nice people, and fucking badass warriors. Relc is my absolute favorite, I think even more than Erin. I don’t know if it is mean or not, but I see Erin more/less as a self-insert type of character, if that makes sense?? Like, I see her doing the things that I would be doing, so I see her As me. So while she is a very good character she isn’t my favorite. Relc took that spot the moment he opened the door and ate pasta. You can’t really hate me for it, Relc is just so so good. Energetic, entertaining, hard-headed, kind, but also a badass fighter wanting to protect his town and skilled enough to do it.

And we get Pisces….who I am s u p e r pissed at. Because of THAT ASSHOLE, Relc might not be friends with Erin! Her first fucking friend in this place! Because he tried to Scare her for food and money, kept trying to weasel his way to Get his way, and kept using any and every manipulation tactic when all else fails! Seriously, fuck that guy.

I don’t give a shit about his necromancy either, or why he went into it as a hobby! (thinking to raise dead parents). He didn’t need to be an entire pompous dick-nugget!

And now more humans have wandered in from the modern world. Did they just….get summoned because they were holding onto a cellphone or technology at the time? Erin had her phone in the bathroom and those two twins had an ipod. So maybe?

Regardless, we got a group of people as the “Human Prophecy Rangers” to be trained. Random campers who wandered into a local village. Random kids end up in a king’s court (they are either going to be thrown in jail or herald as royalty). One lady in the middle of a demon fight, so no idea what is going to happen with her. And a criminal who now is in the adventurer’s guild so I can guess what she is going to do.

These people are going to be like Erin, leveling up in the first class they get, so they are going to be shaped by their surroundings. Peaceful villagers, battle-weary adventurer (please let the criminal chick be chill here), and I don’t even want to know what kind of bullshit those cult-men are telling those other people.

Honestly? I think Erin got the best of them all. Because at least she is more/less self-efficient and doesn’t need to be used/abused by anyone.

Well….good luck.

Interlude

Well this is new. We got ourselves an interlude. No idea what that would entail. Maybe a general overview of what Erin does instead of this day-by-day set up from the other chapters.

Well, it isn’t about Erin. Because we get a general of Erin just trying to deal with the past events of the day. Then we get this

Which means…..maybe we learn more about the people who cast Erin’s summoning spell in the first place?

So this isn’t just a one time mistake by just one powerful guy. This was a cult-effort colossal mistake.

Yall I’m just fucking LAUGHING MY ASS OFF

Erin was a fucking Test Case!!! Either she was used as a practice dummy to see whether human-summoning is an actual thing, or she was fucking sent to the wrong place while the rest of the “human power rangers” were gathered to defeat the Shadow Dark Lord Demon King nonsense they were summoned for.

These Cult Sages Done-Fucking-Goofed because one of their chosen heroes actually fucking LIKE the Drakes and Insect-People!

Oh OOOH this gets better.

1st) natural human reaction. Don’t trust shit until you get information. They are kidnapped after all, even with “good intentions”

2nd) P L E A S E tell me that the Evil Shadow Lord Dark King Demon also summons their own humans to do battle as well, because that shit would be hilarious.

Ok, reading furthing, it isn’t just wandering. Those guys looking for their “holy heroes” popped up portals all over the place. So random people are just walking in like Erin! Not only regular teens, but also apparent criminals.

I love this line. Because, yeah this is a game changer isn’t it? Not only with brand-new people being teleported in by some unknown power, the fact this power exist, but also that they are going to bring in new ideas to interact with this new world. Some for the better, some worse, but regardless the world will shift.

This is such a good line to close on.

Wandering Inn 1.11

I’m getting the hang of this word-blogging thing. It probably helps that we got introduced to some pretty cool characters. (and one asshat)

So Erin is left in the building, and is running low on supplies in everything. She should really go shopping for more stuff, or at least charge a lot more for the fruit juice.

It better not be fish boy or so help me.

Good to know we are on the same page.

So Pisces the magic fish is trying to weedle his way to stay at her inn. I’m guessing he needs a hideout to not only hide from the cops and everyone who hates him, but he needs a safe space to practice his dark arts&craft from the fantasy joanns store. And Erin said no. Which is fantastic. Do I pity his situation? A little, yes. But that is me trying to assume and believe that he is indeed a good person underneath, because all of his actions is just a trash plastic bag who doesn’t know manners if it barrel-rolled into him. Erin has every RIGHT to keep him out.

Dude, I am not underestimating you. I hate you. Big difference. I recognize your talent, but you are a dork that I will never respect.

At least we know what line he won’t cross, good for you but it doesn’t really give you any points in the [decent human] class.

So Pisces is now begging to stay, because anyone in necromancy is killed on sight. Which…..I mean I get where people are coming from because no one wants zombies and undead running around, but I am not so sure if I can approve of that.

Erin started to waver a bit, but not enough for Relc and Klbkch to return like badasses! I don’t want Pisces to die, but honestly he isn’t really a good guy At All. So I am glad they returned to help Erin out.

She only had this building for 4 days, and they are already destroying her hard work. Can Basic Craft fix furniture?

But shit, Pisces can actually fight decently. Unfortunately, not well enough. He finally decided to back down but it is waaaay too late.

I can’t believe Relc is about to kill his in front of Erin. Like, from his perspective the dangerous necromancer could have killed and rose Erin to be undead, or Relc had bad experiences with necromancy. But shit, this is going to be another mark in “things that traumatized Erin” playbook.

Oh Shit. I am amazed, horrified, and the only thing my brain can really focus on is if humans really have green-blood in this universe.

I am so pissed. I am sooooooo p i s s e d.

She didn’t want him to die. She didn’t want anyone to die. So she took it all back to fucking save this fucking asshole, this fish-trashed human. But it cost her a friend. Relc fucking left angry that she would protect someone he views and dangerous and I am sooooooo pissed at Pisces.

Kick. Him. Out.

God this chapter left me angry.

Wandering Inn 1.10

OK, now I know that I am right about the banner thing. The pasta, the blue juice, Pieces-Boy’s bone hand. It is matching the chapters (or at least what was happening previously)

Damn. We can’t even get 24 hours away from this guy? You think he is a wanted criminal that wants some housing help?

I will never, in the future history of my life, ever get tired of this.

Well he now entered the building, making use of her kitchen and food.

Sometimes, it is the petty things that is the most satisfying.

So, someone is controlling the weather here, which leads to some exposition discussion on magic.

Short answer: anyone magic is a mage, and terms are how they get said magic exactly like in d&d. Simple enough, but Pisces is an ass about it so fuck him.

Level 30?? How high do these levels get to?? This sounds less like d&d leveling and more like RPG game leveling.

Sounds like someone doesn’t want to talk about his hobbies. Come on, open up a little. Tell us about yourself and your crimes while we wait for the cops to return.

Hell to the Yes, speaking of cops. The best two cops finally arrive. This is going to be great.

I seriously wish I had the ability to 4th wall break into the stories I read just so I can punch characters in the face, then vanish and read about their confusion.

I am crying because I fucking said this before and it is still hilarious.

Well they are enjoying a lovely conversation of small talk about levels and fixing the place, The Pieces rears his ugly head

I’m just going to call him fish-boy because I hate him and his stupid name.

And here we are, just casually talking about how the rude customer over there tried to rob her the other night, in front of the cops, who she forgot where cops.

I am living for the small time chaos of this scene.

Yeah, these cops are just loving the chaos as well.

YOU BETTER RUN!

FISH-BOY GOT CAUGHT! God I love these cops. They just spear-fished the fish.

Especially when they got a passive Zone-of-Truth thing going on.

So….he’s an ass. I guess he needs some form of income to support his Necromancy hobby. And while I don’t approve of beating him up first, I do like them wanting to split the reward with Erin. These are very good boys.

We need a visual representation for this comic. Because Relc is fucking hilarious.

Ok so reading on, they aren’t just any guardsmen. They are Top Class Guards who are still super important and skilled. And Fish-Boy is being an ass to insult said skills, by I guess having Skills be less than knowlegde? But either way, these two are top class and Fish-Boy isn’t that powerful for all the pomp he gives himself.

Again, Relc fucking kills me whenever he speaks.

He used “capabilities” twice. If you have a 7 syllable vocabulary at least use it.

Or use your Passive Necromancy skills.

So Erin blurted out the Necromancy skill he has….but I have to wonder. Did he steal the skeleton? Because if he was there already, why didn’t he raid everything else before Erin came back? She was gone for hours.

He may be an ass….but he knows how to use his lower level spells to his advantage. I respect his skill (barely) but I hate his face.

Well looks like necromancy is super important to stop. Seeing how all they need is a graveyard to just destroy everything. Guess people take them pretty seriously, even if it an idiot like him.

Which makes you wonder why he took it up in the first place, and why he told Erin.

She is just a lonely person who wants her friends back, and is sort of forced into this role of learning about innkeeping to keep them. At least she knows where the city is now. Hope they don’t have bad feelings about humans.

Wandering Inn 1.09

Yeah, like hell am I going to stop after a skeleton blob thing tried to bust in the door. Time to continue!

Holy shit she one-shot the monster with her puke-pot.

If that turned out to be a con-man or something, congrats on the vomit.

YOU MOTHER FUCKER!

Tie him up, pour the puke on him, and feed him to the goblins if the cops don’t return first.

Congrats my dude, your scam failed and I fucking hate you.

So he tried to dip, but she got smart enough to figure out he only has like 1st level spells/cantrips on him. God he is such an asshole.

No need for violence?? You SCARED and TORMENTED HER!!! For Food!!! Dine and Dash like a fucking NORMAL PERSON!!!

After fully reading this, I really fucking hate this guy. Shove that cloak up your ass Eridan and just go. You better not try to teach Erin about Fantasy Racism or I will punch you with the spike-fish.

NO FUCKING SHIT!!! God the level of arrogance on this guy.

I am so over this guy so much. He fucking had money. This entire time. Erin just kept looking at him as he kept putting in more money to try and make “amends” for his trick. He had silver! HE HAD GOLD!!! He could have paid this entire time!

God I hate him. I would make a better wizard than him. I would make a better conman than him.

Well…that explains a lot. The fruit was partly poisonous, I guess like a blowfish. And I guess this means that it affects different races differently depending on their constitution.

Good to know that she somehow accidentally found a way to safely eat the fruit.

So we got some more general information from this random guy. She is in the Flood Plains, not known to have humans where the locals don’t really like humans. He doesn’t like the non-humans who live here, and sounds like he is currently on the run. But Erin has a point, the first people she met were actually decent, so why would she ever think differently about them?

Oh, this sort of explains the whole “glad we didn’t have to kill her” thing, if there were hostilities between humans and the locals in the nearby city.

Why must my first thought be Homestuck? It is a reflex at this point.

Well look at this go-getter multi-classer. We got ourselves a real Barry Bluejeans over here. 5 gold says that those bones weren’t an illusion.

Wandering Inn 1.08

You know, I still can’t tell if the banner switches periodically or is just associated with the chapter settings, but given how she has now just started her guest-serving abilities, I will assume the latter.

She woke up and how dare she forget Relc’s name. First it was easier to remember, second he was the best guy there!

What? She is going to make a ladder to grab more fruit? Maybe a stick to poke the fruit down?

When you are bored, you get innovative.

Let’s try basket weaving. That is a thing people do right?

Well it worked in 20 fricking minutes! Seriously, these skills kick ass to instantly make a basket in just 20 fucking minutes.

So now she has fruit, a basket, and even snatched more eggs. Those seed-pods she has didn’t scare/affect the bird, which makes sense. Capsaicin doesn’t affect birds, and these are just fantasy-setting spices.

Well she survived…but now she is hella sick. Which fucking sucks. You think the blue fruit is protecting her from whatever disease is in the place? It does small like cleaner fluid after all.

I’m just, like same. Same. The only tow decent people you met and she is just waiting for them to return. Trying to do everything she can to prepare for their arrival. I hope they do return soon.

Well fuck me I guess. They got pulled into overtime on their job. Guess it will just have to be a little longer.

Which….might be good? It can give Erin decent time to heal up her nausea so they won’t think “plague” and kill her.

Well Erin tried waiting for them, but woke up alone in a frosted inn with mysterious knocking.

So my guess is the skeleton guy came back….yikes. It just has to be one of those nights wasn’t it? Like, The Raven type of night.

Oh yeah, yeah I will totally open the door after hearing That^. Yeah, uhuh.

Eat my ass you formless spooky voice, the Innkeeper says NO!

Fuck it got in. It might be the skeleton from before? That got horribly mutated after it’s exploration outside.

You know what? This is funny on a existential horror level. Because congrats you terrifying abomination, you got puke.

Wandering Inn 1.07

I guess we are inviting our new Bug Friend to tea. I hope they have money.

So this explains why the actual insects here only have 4 legs. The 6-legged ones are sentient.

This is fucking hilarious, and we ALL know why

This is getting better and better.  Like, now the other ant-man is going to take a crack at it. All while she is trying to plan her escape route. Classic.

Nevermind, it was a dragonborn. Got to love the party.

I know that this is all in like within the same paragraph…but it is still really fucking funny to me.

I love these two. Lizard boy got complemented by being called a dragon. This is adorable.

So after some gentle nudging, Erin finally lets these two in. From the City Watch, so I guess there is a city nearby…..somewhere in this cube landscape. And she offers them food, which is only polite after all.

If he wasn’t blushing before he certainly is now.

So she finally explains her situation two the cops in front of her. (yeah, city guard, but let’s be real they are cops). No need to lie when MAGIC is the literal answer for everything. And these two are nice and kind enough to at least get the general idea of what is going on.

I just really like this line. It has the same vibe as Hermione’s “we could have been killed, or worse expelled.”

So we finally get names: Klbkch the Ant-Man. And Relc the Drake. I am going to like Relc a lot.

And Klbkch is going to be entertaining because he doesn’t know how to keep his mandibles shut and not tell Erin about the dangerous plague she could possibly catch.

ok, so these guys also know about leveling up. And Classes are officially a confirmed thing for this universe. Hopefully they can stick around to give Erin tips on how to generally live around here, and about leveling up.

I want to be that guy. Why can’t I gain skills like this just because I didn’t let a plant die?

I love how they just kick each other when they did something rude. And yeah, I guess Lizardperson was a rude thing to say, but at least they understand how terrified Erin was from his outburst.

Ok so Erin’s hand injury has shown itself and I was right. It was an infection due to poison by that stupid fish. At least they are offering to heal it up. However

This is interesting. Relc is a bit suspicious of Klbkch’s motive. It looks like he isn’t use to his partner’s altruistic actions. But that’s the real question isn’t it? Why?

I just fucking love Relc. I have decided he is my favorite. (he better not fucking die)

Oh this is new. We have more characters in this story, so now we get their perspectives. Such a clever way to expand the world. You can only follow the characters that have visited the Inn.

Hmm. So the area they are in don’t really have humans, and this sort of implies the social ladder of the races in this world. (Don’t be so despairing Relc. I’m a Human female who would want to hang out with a Drake and an overgrown bug)

These two are fucking hilarious together. Have I said that I love them already?

No way in hell are they passing up more pasta and juice. And this is how Erin’s Inn business starts booming.

So THAT’S It! It wasn’t just any healing potion. It was a powerful one.

These two met a lonely, scared girl in the middle of a dangerous quarantine area who’s first thought was to invite them in for food and more food, and they decided to help her with the best potion they got.

I absolutely LOVE these two.

Of course we got Xenophiles in this planet. What Fantasy RPG wouldn’t?

One sentence later and that was a mood shift. How deadly was that plague??

AND WE LEVEL UP AGAIN! I guess having actual guests around pays in the experience points. 

Wandering Inn 1.06

A cell phone? She kept a cell phone in her travel? ….does it even have reception??

Now I am not an expert in any form of biology or medicine….but you may have been poisoned. That is a possibility of magic poison.

Right, forgot. There was a skeleton. But I guess he vacated once Erin took up shop. So the Inn might feed off of the existence of those who live in it? Or the skeleton just decided it was time to fuck off.

Well the start of her day was waking up to the fact she left a rotting fish in the kitchen now infested with parasites and basically worthless. What a morning.

Ew, that is just making me sick thinking about it. Like, if I see it I would be ok, but imagining it actually makes it worse.

Well now she decided to get rid of the fish

Apparently there is no simple task to EVER do in this universe that doesn’t cause problems.

And this problems are more insects just crawling out of the fish like the plague! Well, at least all those insects are no longer in the Inn anymore. (yuck)

Now she is fighting insects, weird mutant fantasy insects. You think she gets xp for killing one?

WHY must things EXPLODE!!! The Fish Exploded. The Insect Exploded. Is she going to get the strength to explode a goblin eventually??

Oh…..was that why the rock-crab was screaming? It wasn’t the fruit, but the flies inside?

Sometimes….you just have to flip things off. It is nature’s way.

So now she is trying to make bread. Her skills gives her basic information on what to do. So Basic Cooking tells her what she needs and how to do it to make certain food. Meaning the more she increases it, the more complex foods she will be able to make.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t expend to everything about the cooking process. She needs to make a fire, and fire isn’t really cooking (unfortunately). BUT, it does give the idea of if you increase your fire ability, she can eventually make a flamethrower.

My guess is to debone something (yes that is a word)

Listen….sometimes it is nice to know the level of detail they put into minecraft. They do teach a lot passively.

Well she managed to make a fire, but I guess it doesn’t come with a skill, which is a rip.

I swear to god if that is another goblin. How many goblins must Erin deal with??? Can she use her new cooking skills to just, torch the fuckers away by now?

Of course it would. Why wouldn’t it. That seems to be the theme of actions going on currently.

It was a dinosaur.

But you know….it would make sense if dinosaurs were in camo. Better protection and all that.

Well now she has eggs to cook with. Sorry not sorry, a girl has to eat.

I like this. Because even if it is a small thing, she is taking ownership. This is her inn, and she has decided it to be Open.

FUCK YES! The best decision!!

Until it wasn’t….the eggs were alive. It..makes sense. It was something to just happen….but if she needs food this is the best way to do it.

As someone who hasn’t grown up on a farm, and who wasn’t around/use to the idea of actually killing things for food, it is a hard choice to do.

She JUST made food! She just made some really good food, an actually decent meal! And now some idiot comes it to fucking rent a room. It better be worth it to stall her from eating right now.

I am so confused as to what is sentient and what isn’t in this world, but at least this guy seems polite.

Part 3

Hiya! Back to magic story telling! (If I even remember how to properly blog text)

So…Erin….she got fruit, fought a crab with said fruit, kicked goblin ass multiple times….so she is learning about the world around her.

And I guess the Inn does wander at the speed of a glacier. Probably the slowest method of travel, but whatever works I guess.