The Adventures of Food Boy

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Are there any seniors at this school? So I paid like $4 to apparently own this now. And I sort of wished I didn’t. See, I walked in thinking that Food Boy’s powers were going to be the power to eat whatever the hell he wants. Glass, car engines, that’s not a problem for Food Boy! And with how Ezra was set up just eating the worst combinations of food on a bet? Like, eating a trash burrito isn’t a far jump to eating a brick wall! But no, he just gets the power of summoning food. Which they don’t even utilize right!

I am 100% convince that there are no seniors here. Ezra is a Junior running for class president. The dick garret kid is also a junior, who IS the president who does all the school sports events and such. The random ass marine golf coach picked a Junior to be the golf captain. Ergo, the entire senior class was expelled or died via food poisoning, leaving only the juniors as the highest ranked students.

Ezra has no appreciation for his powers. Granted it sounded like his grandma is trying to push him into food based jobs and that was his family legacy, but he can still go to college at Harvard AND summon sandwiches in his hands. The worst thing that really happened was the first day when baloney was shooting out of his hands, and that became more manageable with time. He was making too big of a deal with “these powers are ruining my life” because they didn’t happen sporadically! He purposefully used them to what he wanted(talent show, flinging meat at his friend) and it didn’t work out the way he wanted to! He got in trouble for flinging meat at his friend by drill sergeant golf man, which would happen regardless of food based powers. And he didn’t train his stamina enough to do so much food summoning which fucked up the talent show. Don’t get mad when it doesn’t go your way!

Also, apparently all the food in Uruguay is just terrible now because of the food hand legacy. That would go over well in Uruguay.

They also don’t really have a good grasp of the rules for his powers, and just keep adding rules for “plot drama.” He can summon food from his hands, ok. He MUST add on to the legacy of cooking (…why? Its his destiny, not going further than that). He could solve world hunger, but can’t tell anyone of his powers because then the food he makes will be TERRIBLE (again, sorry Uruguay). And The “don’t use it you lose it on the 59th day” is probably because of food expiration date. Makes the most sense to me.

Hey, the girl friend love interest chick, she was a bit of a dick at the party. She got jealous when Ezra was talking,to the secretary girl. So she golf flirted with Simon guy to make HIM jealous. She didn’t like him, but then Simon started to like her. Meaning she Totally played,with his emotions and his friendship to make him mad. Which, if you weren’t dating to begin with, then don’t blame him for talking to other people. The one girl was nice and was interested in him, sorry she took her chance.

There were a few moments that made me actually laugh. One was the Janitor. He was the real MVP of this movie cleaning up all the messes and just glaring at Erza. The other is this one kid at the end of the movie which screams “FOOD FIGHT” and then just slinks under the table not doing anything. Like he just makes this chaos,and doesn’t even participate in it! That’s great!

Overall: yeah, don’t watch it. It a teen movie that’s just tropes hiding under an obvious trench coat. They make the plot beats so obvious so everything wad just forced instead of natural. And it wasn’t even bad enough to really enjoy making fun of it. Even with a weird concept, its just bland, pure and simple.

Mouse Trap

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Is there such a thing as being too chill? This is probably going to be my shortest review yet for the weirdness reason. Because I honestly can’t tell you what the plot of this movie is. Overview: Snoop Dog’s life as a pimp. That’s it. Where the hell was the story in this? It started out with Snoop wanting to make a Pimp App that went No Where for the rest of the film. Then it jump to him just doing random things AS a pimp. Like talking to girls, buying weed, robbing, talking to other pimps. But there was NOTHING tying them together. I mean, they TRIED to have a plot by the middle where Snoop’s girls are robbing clients so he’s killing people and the cops are investigating them. But what I said right there, that took me looking in hindsight to try and Think of the point of this movie was. Plus side: everyone sounds natural. Down side: I don’t think there are actual lines written for this. I’m pretty sure Snoop told some friends he was making a movie, told them the general theme of the scene, and they just improvised their lines. There us so much meandering going on I couldn’t follow anything. So…this is the weird part. There was a LOT of trap music in there. And it was LOUD! Like, “I can barely hear anyone talking because of the music” loud. But it was also, soothing, it a way. Basically this movie relaxed me so much I was falling asleep!!! Its like, pimp asmr!! And no, I didn’t miss the plot while I had My eyes closed. There wasn’t even a plot to miss! Everything just meanders in hopes for something. Overall: whatever Snoop wanted from this movie I hope he got it because i sure didn’t. It just felt weird, like an unintended anthology series. I don’t like the film, but it also relaxed me so I…appreciate it I guess? But I’m probably never gonna see it again.