I tried to watch an episode of Ancient Aliens about 2 weeks ago. I can’t tell you anything I’ve actually learned from the show, but I tried.

“So either I finish my game or make you wish I was never born”

I never heard that take on the threat, yet it is somehow more menacing.

The 90s didn’t just revealed itself to me, it punched a rocket right into my face.

Having Gnome Guards sneak up on Dib is terrifying, but Dib did say “spread your Zim guts all over an autopsy table” so he gets what’s coming to him.

For all of his Neo-Parkour abilities we saw in the first episode, this sort of boils down to playing “the floor is lava” with robot arms.

“It wasn’t me”

“Yes it was”

There has to be a term for the strange yet childish banter that people have in this show. I know it exists, but I can’t quite put my finger on it.

Yes, the holy unholy light of laser weasels. Something so glorious that we can never let our plebeian eyes gaze upon it.

Jegus Dib, I thought you were an actual spider. …I don’t know if I feel relieved or disappointed that you aren’t.

I didn’t think there would be a moment worse that a kid getting his eyeballs plucked, yet here we are.

We don’t need alien conquerors to impart their unholy abominations if this planet willingly creates flavors like Chocolate Bubblegum Slurpies.

I’m sorry, but did his alien jetpack merge with ports on his skin?? Is Zim part of the Borg? Are the Irken insect Borg?

This is what happens when you don’t teach you robot-dog to shut the door behind him. You get…Visitors.

It’s been 20 seconds and we’ve reached peaked entertainment. Don’t know how we can go from here.

I’m less concerned with how he got the icee, and more concern as to who was the guy who let a dog buy one.

ooooKay? Getting werewolf vibes for some reason. Thought this was going to be about shrinking.

Nanozim

Welcome back to our best alien bug boy.

So now that I know how dark this show can really get, I am hopefully prepared for what will happen next.

I want to say for this title….he shrinks? That’s the only thing I can think of.

Let’s begin.

Well that is the latest installment of Paradox Space. This new batch of comics is glorious! GLORIOUS! They were pretty much a hit (with the exception of Jeff&Bro, but you already knew that about me) so they were glorious to read.

The Scratch and Hussie one had to be the best, hands-down. Just, just for the fact it is those two.

For the favorites, I have to say Viceroy and The Lady Grimme, Horse Play, and Mother & Grub. Just, so so good y’all.

Ah yes, motherhood is a challenge, but one she is willing to bare.

Mama Maryam does not fucking mess around.

Suffer. Suffer the wraith of the vampire glowstick.